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DISCLAIMER! I don't own you or Hetalia.


Shattered Sunflower Memories (Chapter 2)


It had been several days ever since that strange incident, when Ivan found me in the snow. I still hadn't been able to recall any memories, but I sure made new ones. They were pleasant, and I felt happy.

I had somewhat convinced everyone to let me sleep on the sofa, and they promised me I would be able to get my own bed one day. I ate a lot, and my body returned to its' normal, healthy structure. Over the several days, Yekaterina, Natalya, and I had gone out shopping for some warm clothes for me to wear, since I didn't have any yet. I felt like I was part of their family, and I was being embraced by a warm, soft love.

"Aleksandra… are you cooking?"

A tired voice called out from the hall, and I saw a sleepy Ivan, rubbing his eyes. I smiled and nod, showing him my soup.

"I'm making some borscht. I woke up early and decided to make breakfast. It's almost done though."

Ivan rested his chin on my shoulder while I stirred the vibrant-colored soup. He sniffed the air again and sighed. He seemed pleased and happy. He then reached into the fridge and placed sour-cream next to me.

"Borscht is best with sour-cream. It smells lovely, by the way."

I blushed like the color of beets that were used in the soup, and my eyelashes fluttered, making my heart skip a beat. Ivan somehow made me a little nervous, his voice, his presence—everything. I think that this is what you call love.


Later that night, after helping Yekaterina tidy up some things, I went to sleep. Yet I couldn't sleep, and something bugged me. Thinking that a cup of tea would make me sleep, I stood and walked towards the kitchen, only to find light pouring out of Ivan's room. I soon heard voices.

"Ivan, don't hide it from her. I know she's been treated badly, but—"

"No. Big sister, she mustn't know. It will tear her apart again. I need to keep her safe."

"Ivan Braginski, please, I know. But she will find out one day. Secrets will eventually be revealed."

Creaaaaaaak. I jumped, as I realized that I made the noise. Through the cracks of the door, I saw Ivan get up from his bed and he walked quickly towards me. He opened the door with a quick swing, and gazed into my eyes, intensely.


"Is this about me?"

Ivan remained silent. I bit my bottom lip, scared to know, but willing to find out. I felt tears burning my eyes, and my heart wouldn't stop beating with worry. My hands slowly clenched into fists, and I saw Yekaterina come up behind Ivan from the corner of my eyes. I stared back into the Russian's eyes, which soon turned away.

"I'll leave you two alone. Ivan, I warned you. You need to take care of this yourself. Decide what's right. You are a young man now."

The silence screamed with wonder, curiosity, and I felt Ivan's aura of regret. I was right. It must be about me. Then why was he there, in the snow?

"How much have you heard—"

"Answer my question Ivan. I asked it first. Is this about me?"

"да. Now answer my question."

"All I know is that you're hiding something from me."

"Good. Please, don't ask anymore."

"Why can't I know? Should I be afraid to know?"

"Please, I beg you, Aleksandra. I need you to stay this way. I'll regret it again."

The tall Russian turned around, back into his room, saying 'goodnight' before closing his bedroom door. I stood there, waiting for something to happen. The overwhelming feelings in my heart disappeared, and I just stood there. His eyes shone sadness. What was I to him? Did I know him before? Will I ever know?


(name) had found out that I had been hiding something from her. And I don't know to deal with it. Knowing her, I know she would start asking questions. But now, I wanted to stop time, letting me breath. I opened my closet and reached for an album on the top shelf.

There were pictures of me and (name) having fun together. We went through a lot of things together. From being acquaintances, to friends, to best friends, and finally, lovers. But ever since the incident, she had been overwhelmed. That's when everything came to this.

I closed the album and lay down on my bed, hugging the book of memories close to my heart. I fell into deep sleep, shedding a tear before closing my eyes.


Breakfast was quiet. Natalya, who seemed to have heard everything from her older sister, had remained quiet. She chose to stay smart and  read the mood. Yekaterina, on the other hand, had decided it would be best to fillyhe gaps of silence.

"I, uhm, well... Would you like to go anywhere special today, Aleksandra? How about you, Ivan?"

I stood up from my seat, refusing to eat and had excused myself. Before I left to go outside for fresh air, I spotted Natalya jabbing her elbow into the side of the Russian's ribs.

Soon after leaving the house, I wander into the park and take a stroll. I quickly find myself listening to the crunching of footsteps in the snow behind me. I guessed it was Ivan, and I stopped, waiting for him to speak.


It was Natalya. She held out a large album marked, 'Sunflower Memories: Happy Days with (name)'. My back stiffens and I reach out for the book. Natalya sighed and looked into my eyes.

"Please don't tell брат. I swore to him that I'd keep your memories a secret. This won't be enough to make you remember, but here is a fragment of your past memories that I can give to you."

She ran off back to her home and I looked at the album. I guessed that my real name was the one written on the front cover. I found a bench and brushed off the snow, making some room to sit on it.

The album was well-organized. Each photo had a date and caption, and I read each and every one of them. The first one was a picture of what seemed to be when Natalya, Ivan, and I were little. Natalya was hiding behind Ivan's back, and I held hands with the small Russian. Underneath the picture, it wrote; Ivan's first friend, (name). She is a lovely girl, and I hope she will help support Ivan. I easily recognized Yekaterina's handwriting, and immediately thought the picture was taken by her as well.

I flip through the thick album, watching me grow from a child to a young girl, to a teenager to a young woman, alongside Ivan. 'First Tooth Loose!', 'Celebrating (name)'s Birthday', 'Iceskating Together'... The list of events and occasions kept going on and on. Yet, I couldn't recall any of the memories. I soon realized that I didn't see any of Ivan's parents. Making a note to myself, just in case this might've been an important hint to remember, I flip a page.

There was one large picture in the shape of a heart, where Ivan and I were kissing. Next to it was a strip of photos, with me and Ivan acting as couples. On the page next to the pictures was a short journal-like entry. It read:

Today was my first date with (name), and I was very happy to call her my girlfriend. We went around everywhere, like the amusement park and all. It felt nice to hold hands with (name), and I am happy to have met her.
We went to the photo-booth and took some silly pictures of us, being the silly love-birds we are. I hope this love will last forever.

Aleksandra loves Ivan, and has a crush on Ivan. But (name) was his girlfriend. I am both of these people, yet I remain as 'Aleksandra'. I cannot remember anything. I cry, trying to remember. My memories were shattered into a thousand pieces, and I still have to collect more. I only had a small fragment.
I don't own you or Hetalia!

Prologue: [link]
Part 1: [link]
Part 2: You are here!
Part 3: [link]
Part 4: [link]
Part 5: [link]
Part 6: [link]
Part 7: [link]
FIN: [link]
Add a Comment:
C-io Featured By Owner Nov 20, 2012
:iconsadplz: So meaninful
KoroMarimo Featured By Owner Nov 18, 2012  Student General Artist
Makes me happy yet sad because my name is Alexandra :heart:

Huggle to Ivan :huggle: :heart:
XRussiaxPrussiaX Featured By Owner Nov 18, 2012
Wow, that was very interesting o.o SO MANY FEElS~!
(I shed a tear...)
CandyAppleKiss Featured By Owner Nov 18, 2012  Student Traditional Artist
I'm working on Chapter 3, look forward to it!
XRussiaxPrussiaX Featured By Owner Nov 18, 2012
Hehe ^^ I look forward to it alright xD
Lakaka99 Featured By Owner Nov 18, 2012
Add a Comment:

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Submitted on
November 18, 2012
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